Dear Diary: Gun Violence Is Stealing My Sense of Safety

Dear Diary,

Gun violence is stealing any sense of safety I’ve ever had; for myself, my family, and those I love. Yesterday, the 5 year old's school was on lockdown due to a student bringing a gun to school. My child's school. My kindergartener. This is not okay. I am not okay.

I work out daily. I do yoga. I see a therapist. I remind myself to breathe as often as I can. I write. I take anxiety medication. I distance myself from the negative when possible. I give my mind, body, and spirit the TLC they need and deserve.

And yet, the threat of gun violence is always on my mind. It follows me into grocery stores, neighborhoods, crowded spaces, and most terrifyingly..... schools. It sits on my shoulders, presses into my chest, and clouds my mental health.

It is destroying so much, for so many. Too many.

Those who have lost loved ones to gun violence carry an unimaginable grief I will never claim to understand. But those of us still here, watching, reading, writing letters to elected officials, praying it won’t happen to us next; I think we carry something too. We are carrying a fear that is too big to ignore.

I live with a tightness in my chest. I plan escape routes during errands. I hold back my panic at school drop off. I lie awake at night imagining the pain of families who have lost their children, begging the universe that ours will be spared.

I know I am not alone in this. The fear. The anger. The sadness. They are all valid.

It is unfortunate, heartbreaking, and enraging that this is our reality. But it is our reality. It is real. And it needs to change. Now.

Diary, I am exhausted. I need people to start caring, I need people to stop being so awful, so selfish, so empty, and LISTEN. Do what the majority of us are SCREAMING for them to do.

Guns need to go. There is no longer any room for compromise. That time has passed. Guns. Need. To. Go.

Sadly,

Della